sad news
| The happiness and excitement of the last week have been dampened by recent events at home. I knew that my dog Maya had not been doing well--she'd been having frequent seizures and clearly wasn't herself. On Thursday morning I got a call from my dad, and he told me that Maya had gotten a lot worse and they were doing all they could to treat whatever was wrong, possibly an infection in her brain tissue, and hopefully not a brain tumor. He told me that she might not last much longer. On Thursday night when I called home my mom sounded slightly more optimistic, but Friday night when I called again, the pause on the phone when I asked my sister how she was told me all I needed to know. Maya was put to sleep at about 9:00 am Friday morning December 30th, 2005, with my mom and Hannah holding her in their arms and with a loving and compassionate vet sharing their tears, knowing how much this wonderful dog has meant to our whole family for the past 6 years. Anyone who knows me knows how much I loved Maya. She really was a member of our family; whenever we were home, she was happy, and she was the source of so much joy for all of us. She loved nothing more than to be close to us, sitting with us on the couch or sleeping next to me on my bed. It is so hard to even think of home without thinking of Maya, waiting by the front window for her family to come home, and wiggling uncontrollably with pure joy when the front door opens and she runs to greet us. What makes everything even harder is the fact that I am 8,000 miles away from home right now and cannot be there grieving with my family. I am so thankful that I have good friends around me, and of course the Gimses, to comfort me and let me cry and share my memories of Maya. But I want to be home. Two weeks feels like too long to wait. When I've talked with my friends here about going home, we all have said (somewhat jokingly) that we were looking forward to seeing our pets more than our families. In a way this was true, though--while I missed my family and friends so much at times that it was painful, at least I was able to talk to them. But I couldn't wait to get home and see my Maya, to let her sleep on my lap while I sat on the couch with my family. I missed her tangible presence more than anything. And now it is so hard to realize I will never get to see her or pet her ever again. I do believe she is in a better place now. I once heard heaven described as a purer, cleaner, brighter version of life on earth. My vision of heaven now includes my wonderful little Maya, free from all suffering and pain, frolicking and happy and waiting patiently as always for her family to come home once and for all. There is a Maya-sized hole in my heart which will never fully heal. I've barely stopped crying since I heard the news from my sister last night. I keep remembering things about her and it breaks my heart to know she won't be there when I get home in 2 weeks. Home won't be the same. That's the thing about life, I guess--we're always wishing for everything good not to change. We selfishly hope for one more hour, one more week with those we love. Time is never enough. It is so precious. What can we do when we lose something we love? I thank God for his gift of unconditional love given to us in the form of a sweet, joyful puppy named Maya. I miss her so much. |
posted by Abby @ 8:27 AM
3 Comments:
You said it just right Ab. I miss her so much too. Mom
my thoughts and prayers are with you and the family, dear abby. what a great crazy dog maya was. hope you're doing okay. i love you! <3linden
Awww, Abby, I'm sorry I just read your blog today. I wish I could be there to give you a hug. I know how much Maya meant to you all. She was (and is) a bundle of energy and light that everyone will miss. Sending you my love over internet, mind and universe!
love, gina
:)
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